Black Rose

Your First Gateway Meeting

Welcome to Black Rose!

This page is designed to help you anticipate what to expect when attending a Gateway meeting.

Black Rose designed Gateway to be a welcoming, non-threatening way for people to learn more about BDSM and about the local BDSM community.  As such, it is our goal to make the meeting as comfortable as possible for you.  We know that for some people, knowing what to expect goes a long way towards easing fears.  If you have questions that aren’t answered here, you can always e-mail, and you should receive a response within a day or so.

Where is Gateway?

Gateway is held at The Crucible — but don’t panic. Yes, it’ll be your first visit to a dungeon, but you’ll be there on a night when all the lights are on, everyone’s clothes are on, and nobody is playing. After you’ve gotten your head around this experience, you will be better prepared for Dungeon 101 the next night.

How much does it cost?

Gateway costs $5 to attend. Cash, major credit cards, and most electronic payments are accepted.

What should I wear?

Please do not wear obvious fetish clothing as you approach the door from outside. The Crucible is immediately next to a residential neighborhood, and we are not the only people in the area. Any normal street attire is fine, whether you’re in jeans and a t-shirt or a business suit. Many attendees come straight from work.

Do I need to bring anything?

Bring $5, your curiosity, and any questions you might have.  We’ll have handouts that cover lots of the basics, but a pen is always handy to take notes. But we don’t need to see your ID or references or anything like that.

What happens at Gateway?

When you get to The Crucible, come on inside. Walk on through the lobby, through the wide hallway, and into the main room. Once you’re there, you’ll pay your entrance fee, grab a handout and sign in (we ask for some basic demographic questions that do not include your name) and find a seat.

The Gateway coordinators will introduce themselves and go over the basics of who Black Rose is and what we do.  We try to keep this portion of the program short, so we can get to your questions.  Once we’ve covered the basics, we’ll open the floor to questions.  No question is stupid or inappropriate.

At some point during the meeting, you’ll also receive a discount card.  One will get you a discounted admission to a BR Tuesday night education meeting.  The other will get you a discounted admission to a Dungeon 101 in the next few months.

When the meeting ends, the coordinators usually stick around to answer questions and make sure everyone got a handout.  If you need a ride to the Metro, please feel free to ask around.

At no point will you be required to say anything, unless you choose.  We won’t ask your name.  We will tell you about the benefits of membership in Black Rose, but we won’t sell you a membership that night.  Gateway is designed to be a low-pressure, low-key meeting; a chance for you to dip your toe in the water before you dive all the way in.

If you have questions about Gateway, please email  We hope to see you there!